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Bereavement

The following are all natural responses to grief.  Because grief can be so painful and seem overwhelming, it frightens us.  Many people wonder if they are grieving in the "right" way, and if the feelings they have are natural.  It is important to cry and talk with people when you need to.  Chisholm Trail Hospice has a MSW and Chaplin on staff to provide individual and group bereavement support including follow-up with family 13 months post death. 

Feelings

People who suffer a loss may experience one or more of the following feelings or emotions:

  • Extreme sadness
  • Loneliness
  • Restlessness, looking for activity but finding it difficult to concentrate
  • Feeling as though the loss is not real, that is didn't actually happen
  • Guilt over things that did or didn't happen in the relationship with the deceased
  • Anger at your loved one for leaving
  • Mood changes over the slightest things
  • Crying at unexpected times

Thoughts

  • Sense your loved ones presence, finding yourself expecting them to walk in the door at the usual time, hearing their voice or seeing their face
  • Experience an intense preoccupation with the life of the deceased
  • Being unsure of what the future holds
  • Need to reorganize daily activities

Actions

  • Wander aimlessly, forget, and not finish things you have started
  • Have difficulty sleeping and dream of your loved one frequently
  • Assume mannerisms or traits of your loved one
  • Attempt to take care of other people who seem uncomfortable around you, by politely not talking about your feelings of loss
  • Tell, retell, and remember things about your loved one and the experience of their death

Physical

  • Tightness in the throat
  • Heaviness or tightness in the chest
  • Weakness and fatigue
  • Racing heart
  • Over-sensitivity to noise
  • Shortness of breath
  • Dry mouth
  • Stomach knots and nausea
  • Loss of appetite or eating more
  • Loss of sleep or sleeping more

Grief Reminders for Healing

  • You may never resolve all of the issues surrounding the death of your loved one.
  • Now is a good time to learn new ways to take care of yourself-be imaginative.
  • Laughter is a natural emotion that helps healing-find laughter where you can.
  • The remedies for grief are time, courage and love...all applied with tenderness
  • Take time to treasure memories of your loved one.
  • Embrace your spirituality.